On Mold

I walk into Home Depot and find the guy in the lumber department who can cut sheets of plywood.
HD Guy: "Whaddaya need?"
Me: A piece of 1/2-inch CDX [exterior grade] plywood cut to a certain size.

HD Guy: "Whaddaya using it for?"

Me: "It's going in the ceiling above the tub."

HD Guy: "CDX is a bit of a rough finish for interior use. Are you sure that's what you need?"

Me: "Yeah. It's an old mobile that I'm going to tear down in a year, and I just need this to hold the ceiling up in the meantime."

HD Guy: "Sounds in pretty rough shape. Have you had it checked for mold?"

Me: "No, I don't need to check it for mold."

HD Guy: "I don't know. Mold's a big problem in this climate and some types can make you real sick or even kill you."

Me: "I don' t need to check for mold."

HD Guy a bit perplexed and exasperated: "Why don't you need to check for mold?"

Me: "Because I can see the mold. I don't need to check for mold, it's right there."

Mutual laughter.